The Green Lantern

Fuck this shit

It only took a couple hours for my lovely wife to call me out on my post from yesterday.  In the evening yesterday, I saw a preview for a new movie coming out based on the comic book the Green Lantern.  I'm not going to lie, it looks fucking terrible.  Like, the worst possible movie of all time.  Great for the kids, perhaps?  Great for the comic book nerds, perhaps?  For me?  God no.

First off, I hate movies based off comic books.  The main reason is because all these movie studios just grabbed up any and all comic book and made them into massive blockbusters, and it's just such a rehashed idea to me.  I understand there is a huge legion of comic book fans out there, one of which I am not, by any stretch of the imagination.  I think I owned two comic books growing up.  They were Batman.  Batman is cool.  Batman was on TV and shit.  Who the fuck is the Green Lantern?  I believe he was on some fighting game I had for the Sega Genises back in 94 or something, but he didn't have his own TV show.  Not one that I ever saw anyway.  So no, I don't give two fucks about the Green Lantern in the first place.  Not that I have to give a fuck about what a movie is about to enjoy it, but it helps.  It really helps.

So anyway, there was some CGI monster thing in the preview and Ryan Renolds looking all buff and what not.  All I saw was a bunch of special effects thrown together, and cash registers cha-chinging in the background.  The Green Lantern movie to me is the Backstreet Boys and New Kids On The Block tour.  CA$H GRAB, Y'ALL.

The point here is that I tweeted about how terrible the movie looked, and my wife says "you're a hypocrite!" No, I clearly said this yesterday, which makes me not a hypocrite in this situation:

 Not that Fast 5 is necessarily a bad movie, I just know already that that is not my type of movie.  Neither is Thor, by the way.  I generally like every movie I've ever seen, to be honest, but maybe that's because I'm picky when it comes to which movies I watch.


See?  I didn't say I like every movie.  I only like the movies I choose to watch.  There are hundreds of movies (each year?) that I will never see because they look like a total fucking waste of time.  This movie, The Green Lantern, is one of those movies.  


So there.  ::sticks tongue out::

(Something happend to my font up there and I can't fix it.  So...sorry about that.)