I don't know what I want.

I titled the blog before I wrote it, because I wasn't sure what was going to come out. I don't know what I want to write about. Today is a Monday, which is usually a day people tend to hate. Not me, at least, not anymore. I have no reason to hate Mondays. I am off on Mondays, so therefore I kinda love Mondays. I guess if anything, I would hate Tuesdays, simply because of work. But i really don't have any reason to hate any day I work because my job is such a cake walk anyway. Just show up, try not to get too bored. It is the ideal gig for me. Like I told Brian on the phone last night, it's exactly what I used to do as a tech, but when I do nothing for an entire 8 hour shift, that's OK. In fact, that's what I'm supposed to do! All I have to do is hope that nothing out of the ordinary happens while there. Thus far, it has been smooth. I really, really hope it stays that way.

So I try to read the Tennessean every morning. This morning I actually accomplished more of that task than usual actually, probably due to the fact that Monday's paper usually is much thinner and less daunting than other days. But today seemed exceptionally thin on news stories. I read the stories on the main page, which continued to the back pages, and when those were finished, i realized that there were no short middle stories withing the other pages. They were all just continuations of front page stories. My favorite part of the paper has become the Opinion section. Don't know why I never fell in love with the opinion section in the Mining Journal, but I just think there are so many people down here that i have conflicting views with that it just makes them funny as hell to read. I realized this morning that I can place any letter to the editor into three different categories. There is the nice person who wants to thank someone for recognizing something they believe in. There's the pissed off republican who actually seems relatively well informed and well intentioned, but comes across as a crazy southerner who won't let his beliefs and way of life be compromised by people he believes are after him, just making him out to be a paranoid sore loser. And then theres the condescending asshole. This term is copywritten by Bethany Perala actually, so props to her for that. The condescending asshole is the guy who is basically saying "well done, asshole." This individual usually is on the borderline of being the pissed off republican, but he's just more fed up with stuff and knows theres no way he can get what he wants if he is a pissed off republican, because he knows how that really looks, as I indicated above. He also seems more in disbelief of what he sees going on around him, as if he was also surprised when his son or daughter all of a sudden grows up and gets a job, moves out, starts a family, and wonders what the hell happened. I wish I could provide examples, but it's not that i tried to find examples and had a hurdle in providing them, it's just that I'm too lazy to seek them out. I don't know if they're available on their website or whatever, but if so, seek them out and read some. I don't get excited about shit for nothing.

I drank Makers Mark last night, as well as some PBR Light. The only person i could have been a drunk asshole to was my wife and I don't know if i came across as that way, but it certainly feels that way this morning. I hate myself when I'm drunk because I don't know how to control myself. This is a problem dating back to the first time I ever even drank. Hate it hate it hate it. Wish I could change it, but don't know how. I got an idea, FUCK IT.

**takes break to check phone for Twitter updates.** **Circa Survive signed to Atlantic**

How come everyone seems to know who Circa Survive is. I have no fucking clue who they are. One thing i do know, is that that italic part was a total accident. I just thought of a great band name!!! Itallica. That's fucking great. This part at the end got useless didn't it?

until tomorrow or something, piece out!!!