No Homo

Ever use the phrase "no homo" do guard yourself against looking like a gaywad? I have, and usually it's done to be funny, not serious. Example: "No homo, but that sweater looks really nice on you, bro." You say "no homo" so you can compliment a fellow man on things that a "real man" wouldn't normally compliment. In all honesty, it's ridiculous that we as a society are so homophobic that we have to make sure the people we deal with understand very clearly what sex of human we enjoy fucking. From a comedy standpoint, however, "no homo" is funny, and not in a demeaning way, either. Though I suppose calling someone, even in denial of being so, a "homo" is demeaning, but we're talking about being funny here, not being an asshole.

Anyway the point I'm trying to make here is not so much as to support or advise against the use of the term "no homo" but more of pointing out that it's funny to say. Max Bemis of Say Anything tweeted the other day the idea of using the "no" in front of other labels you don't want to be associated with, even if you have feelings that way. For example, he coined the term "no hipster" to use before certain things you want to announce that you enjoy, but don't necessarily want to send the wrong message to people. "No hipster, but I really like the new Arcade Fire album." That's the example he gave. I'll say, "No hipster, but I like to look through the used vinyl bins at the record store and see if I can find anything cool in there." See how that works? I don't want to be branded a hipster because I like vinyl.

What the fuck is the problem with hipsters anyway? Why do people not want to be a hipster? Why would you dislike hipsters? I mean, I understand some of them can be real douchey, but that's okay, isn't it? I didn't really know what a hipster was until, like, last year. Small town will do that to a guy, ya know?

Anyway, I'm totally rambling. Try to incorporate the "no" in front of labels you're trying to avoid and have some fun with it. Life is too short to waste your time being offended. It's also probably too short to waste your time worrying about what other might label you as if you complement some other guys nice jeans. So...yeah. Just go with it, man. Didn't really think this one through...